Lets get random, bitches!
Oh, how I do love my random Twitter stream!
FYI, Sunday is my birthday. You don't need to send flowers. Chocolate would be ok though. I won't mind.
Dear power company, we're homies and all, but you better get your shit together before game time. The #Phillies won't wait for you!
The Kid has some rank gas tonight! He thinks it's so funny that he's trying to sit on The Hub so he can "make Daddy stink!" #fartsarefunny
A dude with a murse held the door open for me. It felt so wrong.
My Twitter stream is like people watching except without the awkward moment when I get caught staring.
No matter what you do, be unapologetically you. #quotesbyme
Mother fucker! http://yfrog.com/nbymfpj
AMEN!!! RT @alison1L: Internet friends are the best kind of friends.
The Diva was so excited to wish me happy birthday that she woke me up SUPER early to scream it to me in baby babble. Thanks, sweetie!
I'm pretty sure I just saw Santa on a Harley!
Mirror mirror on the wall, I am my mother after all! ;)
Do what you do with ownership and conviction. Be responsible for yourself and have no regrets. #quotesbyme
Hubby got me the new iPhone 4 for my birthday. I must say, your tweets look pretty sexy on this little number!
#itemsindorasbackpack She needs a damn GPS so she can stop asking my three year old for directions!
Hubby gave me his cold for my birthday. Shoulda made him sleep on the couch. Not cool.
Does anyone want to work for me, give me the paycheck, pick up my kids, cook them dinner and deal with the tantrums? Mommy needs a sick day!
Dear Diet Coke, your love, your love is my drug!
You know who you're friends with? The incredible shrinking woman! That's right, down a full dress size in only 4 weeks! I'm a sexy bitch!!
I'm feeling really fucking spectacular tonight!!!
And here's your random man-candy of the week! Enjoy and stop drooling on your keyboard!