Doubleday probably thinks I'm a smut whore

If you have stopped by my book blog, Secrets of a Book Lover, then you know that I have an addiction to porn for women steamy romance novels.  Being the bargain hunter that I am, I'm always on the lookout for good deals on books.  So, I decided to head over to Doubleday Book Club to see what that was all about.  

$0.99 for 5 books?  Not too shabby!  But what's the fine print?  I only have to buy 4 books in the next year?  That doesn't seem so bad!  I can get one of my 4 now for only $5.99?  Ok, deal.

So I picked out my books, which included Jaci Burton's The Perfect Play and Changing the Game.  Now, I can't stress to you how many women have been fantasizing over the covers of these books.  Don't believe me?  Have you SEEN the covers?  Because if you think I'm exaggerating, why don't you take a look for yourself.  I'll wait while you oggle. 


Now do you understand?  But wait, there's more where that came from.  Because Taking a Shot is due out in February.  Care to see that one?  Yeah, I thought so!

So now that you're all hot and bothered and completely distracted from the point of this post, I'll continue.

So I'm getting all giddy with excitement that I'm getting both of these deliciously delicious (no, that's not a typo) books in addition to four other books for only $6.98.  I mean, The Perfect Play is like $15 alone so I'm all "Score!" and ready to click "confirm" on my order.  But then I look at my total and it comes to $32 and now I'm all "What the fuck?"

Sure, the books are practically free but then they rape you on the shipping!  Seriously?  $25 for shipping?  You have got to be kidding me!  There is a "shipping rebate" at the end of the transaction but I'm sure you have to sign up for some shit that no one wants.  So I click the back button just to make sure I did everything right and when I click on total again, there's no shipping.  So now I'm all, "Yahoo, let's get this party started!" but when I click on confirm, it doesn't ask me for my payment info like it did before.  It just tells me "Thank you for enrolling, your membership is under review" or something like that.

Now I'm confused.  Is this some sort of elite membership club?  Will they review my selections and be all "Ew, this chick is a smut whore.  We don't want her as a member."  Because that would be way judgmental and so not cool, Doubleday.  I'm just saying.

So here I sit, like a high school senior waiting on her acceptance letter to Harvard except the high school senior is a smut whore and Harvard is a frickin online book club.  What the fuck?


Leave the rain boots on, baby!

I know it's been forever but for the two people (ok, one person) who still subscribe and wait patiently by their RSS feed, you'll be ok.

So I got these awesome new rain boots (from JustFab, in case you're wondering).  They're super sexy as far as rain boots go.  I mean, I would totally do me if I saw me walking down the street wearing these rain boots.  I'd be all "Hey baby, want some fries to go with that shake?" and I'd be all "Hey yourself" and then I'd be all "Leave the rain boots on, baby!"

Not that I did myself in my rain boots or anything, but you get the idea.

Anyway, it was raining this evening when I went to go pick up pizza for dinner so I threw on my rain boots.  For some reason, The Hub thought I looked ridiculous in black and white houndstooth rain boots with my shorts.  I thought I looked sexy.

When I got home he was all "Oh, you look cute" but not in the "I want to jump your bones right here on the kitchen floor" kind of way.  More like in the "Would you please take off the stupid boots before my penis shrivels up and dies" kind of way.

I thought I looked sexy.  He thought I looked stupid.  Tomato, to-mah-toe.